This Is Closure

 

This is closure:









I’m writing waves for you



No matter how many stones I throw,

My splash seems so insignificant to the rest.


--------------------------------------------------------

Eagle Bay:



Maybe I will leave you here

You and your wishy washy ways,

Will fit right in here

All day and all night

Washed up ; Carried back in


You’re the seaweed,



And he is the pearl,



And I am the girl



Crashing at wakes










----------------------------------------------------------

Difference of opinions:


We couldn’t agree on a single thing.


But now I think we both agree,



We aren’t meant to be.




‘When you call I forgive and not fight’ 
(1)


--------------------------------------------------------




I think part of me will always change with the season.




-------------------------------------------------------


Dearly Departed (plane emoji)







and honestly dear,

if that was your version of loving me

with all your heart,

I want no part.



-----------------------------------------------------------


Did you know?

 It would just be so fun to be in love with you forever

 

-----------------------------------------------------------
 
I’m not *mad anymore






I’m not upset, frustrated, cranky, annoyed, depressed,
 sad, or any feeling at all really.



For you,

I feel nothing now.

And I’d like to leave you here.

Either to grow or to rot,



You choose.


-----------------------------------------------------------


I dreamt of you here 









 

 Even in my dreams you are harsh and demanding.

You were there with your mess of a mop and 
those blue eyes that could hurt, not kill, but hurt.

Even in the comfort of closed eyes,
 you manage to sneak your way into my mind.

But this is the way it’s always been
 (me against you)we were never a team.


Who got their way this time?


Because I’m always the prey while you’re the predator.



I’m just happy I got out alive.




------------------------------------------------------------


Eclipse of You

 

verb
  1. 1.
    (of a celestial body) obscure the light from or to (another celestial body).
 

 

I’m done letting you take my light



I am the light at the end of a long dark hallway

I am the sole streetlight on the block still flickering

I am the lone flicker of flame from a BIC lighter on empty



I may seem small and insignificant



But I would argue that I am the light you need the most.


-----------------------------------------------------------


To Reader:

 

I know it may seem like I am being a little harsh.
 It may seem as though I am the stupid one for even
 falling for him, and to be honest I am.



It wasn’t all bad times. I can assure you there were 
times when my heart felt so large I couldn’t contain
 myself. I don’t think I could ever feel that again 
with someone. It was a kind of love you learn from, but 
not repeat.



All I ask is that you understand that young love is dumb
 love. I didn’t know what I was looking for and I didn’t 
know how to love myself. You may shake your head or wonder
 why I didn’t just get up and leave (I wonder this myself 
at times) but all I knew of love was that it was hard work.
 All I saw growing up was my parents constantly 
compromising.



I tried to compromise with him, 

but we were never on the same page.



-----------------------------------------------------------



Strong Stable Simple

 



I am as strong as a 100-year-old oak tree standing 
straight against the worst storms.


I am as stable as a metal pillar cemented into 
the sea to guide a sailor’s way.


I am as simple as a splash coming to rest.



-----------------------------------------------------------

Grieving You


Denial:

Our entire relationship was built on denial. From day one 
your true colours were visible, 
but then denial and me became good friends.



Anger:

     After the general ‘honeymoon’ phase, the dark red 
clouds of anger began to set over us. I tried to 
forgive you and not fight, but it was worse at night 
when all I could hear were truths screaming at me.
 I gave up everyone around me to be in love with you.



Bargaining:

This is where the bargaining comes in. It’s with the 
loss of one of my best friends (who you had your way 
with anyways) and everyone else left like a giant snowball
 rolling out of my life. I took a bad deal when I laid 
eyes on you.


Depression:

Once you finally had me alone in a city new to me, 
this is where the depression set in. I was truly alone. 
I mean, all I had was you, which wasn’t much at all. 
Especially once you met new bargains in the city.



Acceptance:

I knew you weren’t jogging every morning. 
I knew there was a reason you showered constantly.
 I knew you weren’t working ‘overtime’. 
I knew all of these things, yet I stayed. 
I accepted the fact that your faith 
never truly laid with me. 
I accepted that this was the fate 
I had chosen for myself.



I accepted the deal




--------------------------------------------------------


 

 

It’s your fault for kissing a writer in 
the dark in the first place

 



I hope my initials on your ankle weigh you down



Like concrete binding your feet to the ocean floor



I hope the waves consume you



--------------------------------------------------------



Burning Bridges

*Building






I burnt so many bridges that day I decided to stand by you

I don’t plan on repairing them

But I’ve already built more bridges than
 you could dream of darling



---------------------------------------------------------

The One After You

 

I was lost.



He smiled at me from up high.



Sometimes when you’re as lost as I was, 
you need to lose yourself in someone else.



I may have only known him 24 hours,
 but he taught me more about love than you did in 4 years.

I remember it feeling wildly different.



I knew I wasn’t in love with him. Obviously.



But the way he held me and touched me...
With a love and care I had never felt before.

And I want to thank you for that.



Thank you for letting me know what I was missing out on.



Thank you for reviving my faith in love.



‘I’m so sorry that I’m leaving you so little to believe in’
(2)


---------------------------------------------------------

 

The One During You

 

I have never felt so low,

So wretched,

Until I got into my car and left you there.





Sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened if I had 
listened to you, stayed with you.

We were right for each other but at the wrong times.

Please know that you still mean a lot to me.

You taught me how to be careless in my writing
 (and how to drive a stick shift)


You were always there for me when I needed you.

Thank you.


I hope I offer you the same luxury.

‘You has me at first sight, even if it means nothing now’
(3)


-----------------------------------------------------------

The One Who Matters

 

You cried when I told you of my past, all of this.



Which hurt me more than he ever did.



I never want to see you upset; I especially don’t want 
to be the cause of your sadness.



Because you are the literal light of my life.



My life was so dark before I met you.



In everything you do, you make me smile.



And you don’t just make me happy but you have actually 
helped me become the woman I aspire to be.



You have shown me how to be selfish in the right ways, 
but also how to love fully without mistrust or anger.



I have never loved anyone the way that I love you.



Thank you.



‘I don’t like who I am when I’m not with you’
(4)


------------------------------------------------------------

 Where We Started

 

So here I am. You’re somewhere here too.


This is where we fell in love.

This is where you broke my heart.

And this is where I leave you.



I’ m leaving you in her basement where we started.



I’m leaving you at that house party down the street
 you couldn’t handle.



I’m leaving you at the pond where we smoked our first
 cigarettes together.



I’m leaving you in the pit I used to call home,
 but don’t feel the need to visit anymore.


I don’t feel the need for you anymore.



And I know that you feel you dodged a bullet by leaving.



But honestly dear,



You missed out on the best you could ever get.



‘I hope you’re miserable’
(5)




-this is closure-

 

———————————————————————

(1) Supercut by:Lorde

(2) Laika by: Boston Manor

(3) First Sight by: The Devil Wears Prada

(4) Honey by: Mooseblood

(5) I Hope You’re Miserable  by: Mooseblood

 

About The Author

i write lame poems that no one really reads

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